return my video game
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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