He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
