are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
Randomize
