hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
