I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize
