help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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