Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
