? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
birth control should be required to get into college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
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