My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
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you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
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Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
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