one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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