So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
