I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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