oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize