Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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