then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
Randomize