HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize