I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
