I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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