Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
