you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Randomize