i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
he just fucked me for my cheese..
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
