Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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