I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
I wish i was in the wii world.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Randomize
