i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
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He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
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Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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