**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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