Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
