you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Randomize
