Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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