You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
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