In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Randomize