i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
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When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
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In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize