thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Randomize