they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
My brain says no but my pants say off.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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