the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Welp...herpes.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
