If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
pray to the hookup gods
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
