fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
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