the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize