I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
this is an emotional support booty call
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
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