you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
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