the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
