is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Randomize
