oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize