her vagine was all disorganized.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Actions speak louder than pants.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Randomize