Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
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