I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Randomize
