let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Randomize
