i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
