you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
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