Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I had to cum in my sink.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
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