haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
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