just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
worst night to have a conscience
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
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