you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
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My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
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I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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