Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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